Touching Hands

By Molly Butler

I’m a recovering people-pleaser. Here are a few things I’ve learned:

Sometimes, caregiving can be selfish- it can rob loved ones of their own growth. Not setting boundaries shows a disregard for a relationship- it means you’re not planning and pruning to make it last and grow. It can create an environment ripe for burning out or harboring resentment. Sometimes, going the extra mile is just a hollow performance- sure, you stayed late, but the work is done halfheartedly.

Sometimes, we get swept up in bright, shiny possibilities. We want opportunity. We want to feel useful, helpful. But, just because we can do something doesn’t mean it’s the most value we can contribute. Holding out or saving our talent for the right fit can save time, energy and relationships. Lord knows I’ve wasted plenty of time and energy yessing every doable task that arrived on my desk. That’s time and energy I can’t get back, but a worthwhile lesson I get to carry forward.

Your ‘yes’ isn’t worth much if ‘no’ isn’t also on the table.

It could be anything. A job. A task. An event. A relationship. Your “yes” isn’t worth much if “no” isn’t also on the table. So, bring it with you. Make “no” a familiar companion. By saving your “yes” for when you really mean it, you ensure your presence and participation are willing and genuine.

We’ve got a lot of good stuff happening this weekend. We hope you’ll find some fun things to do, but feel free to say no!


A new exhibit is coming to the 410 Project! Wardah Sabrie’s Perspective Through Prints and Installation opens for viewing this Friday from 2-6 p.m. with an opening reception from 7-9 p.m. Wardah Sabrie is a Somali American printmaker living and working in Mankato. Sabrie primarily works with silkscreen, and her prints are based upon the Somali culture practice, her own emotions and her immigrant experience. Reception is free and open to the public. The Mankato Makerspace will have two Stained Glass classes this Friday. From 3-6 p.m. or 6-9 p.m., come by for Sun Catcher Make-N-Take. Classes are $60 and cover personal instruction, supplies and safety equipment. Register here to participate.

Head to Mount Kato to watch Mankato West Varsity Alpine Skiers take on Edina, beginning at 5 p.m. Stick around to hang out in the chalet or get out on the hill. Or, watch the MSU Men’s Hockey team take on Arizona State at the Mayo Clinic Health System Event Center, beginning at 7:07 p.m.

Get out and have some fun! Mankato Brewery will host an Adult Spelling Bee from 7-9 p.m. Entry is $15 per person on teams of 3-4 people, and registration includes a drink ticket! Or, head to the Oleander Saloon at 8 p.m. for B&B Karaoke.


Get outside! It’s time for the Anthony Ford Pond Hockey Classic at Spring Lake Park! Watch several teams compete on frozen Spring Lake Pond during this two-day event. There will be a sledding hill and 12 separate rinks. There’s also a warming house to take a break from the cold. Games are categorized into youth and adult teams, and all entry fees go towards local charities to support the fight against childhood leukemia. Join Bent River Outfitter for snowshoeing this weekend! They’re heading to Ney Nature Center at 11 a.m. The trip includes a guide, shuttle service, snowshoes and poles! Call or text 507-508-2175 to sign up.

You’re invited to the Blue Earth County Library for Mandarin Storytime! From 10:30-11 a.m., Professor Tingting Zhang of Martin Luther College will be there to share stories, rhymes, music, poetry and fun with Mandarin speakers and those interested in learning! Call the Children’s Wing at 507-304-4020 for more info. At 2 p.m. and 7:30 p.m., the Minnesota State Department of Theatre & Dance will host Wounded Healers, a music and spoken-word performance piece on the Black male experience. Tickets are available here.

The Mankato Brewery is opening its doors for another FREE brewery tour this weekend, beginning at 3 p.m. Enjoy free samples and pints for purchase. Catch DNA, Levatti, DStone, BBF June and ‘Dler at the What’s Up Lounge in Mankato, beginning at 8:30 p.m. This event is 21+, and the cover is $10. Head to the Blue Moon Bar at 9 p.m. for blues, classic and modern rock and a splash of country by Tri Eight.


Bent River Outfitter is headed to Seven Mile Creek for some snowshoeing at 1 p.m! Trip will include a guide, shuttle, snowshoes and poles. Just meet at Bent River, and they’ll handle the rest!

The Anthony Ford Pond Hockey Classic wraps up Sunday at Spring Lake Park. The Johnson Hall Toy Show is open at the Nicollet County Fairgrounds in St. Peter from 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. Catch “The American” performing at Bethany Lutheran College’s Trinity Chapel from 3-4:30 p.m.

Added Value: Are You People Pleasing?

There are plenty of free resources online like this one and this one to see if you’re struggling with some people-pleasing tendencies. Of course, we all do some of these things some of the time, or maybe you realize you struggle with just one to two tendencies. Regardless, it’s good to be mindful of these patterns and begin to analyze them so that we can live a more intentional life.


Weekend High Notes is a regular feature by Molly Butler. Molly covers weekend events, live music, and culture in the Greater Mankato Area. Suggestions are welcome using the MankatoLIFE contact form.